Every now and then I come across an article I wish I had written.  This one is The Business of ADHD by Child Psychiatrist Winston Chung, MD.  If I had written it, I would have titled it ADHD Greed.

Three highlights are:

• The American Psychiatric Association is considering lowering the number of symptoms needed for an ADHD diagnosis from 6 to 4.  This is alarming because we already medicate 57% of children who don't meet the current criterion.  Lowering the number of symptoms needed will surely increase the number of children wrongfully receiving unneeded medication.  Woops, I forgot.  It's about profits.

• Researchers promise pharmaceutical companies results that would benefit the drug company -- before they conduct the study!

• Allen Frances, MD, Chair of the Task Force that created the current diagnostic criteria for ADHD (and other disorders) laments that his group "inadvertently contributed to three false 'epidemics' - attention deficit disorder, autism and childhood bipolar disorder. Clearly, our net was cast too wide and captured many 'patients' who might have been far better off never entering the mental health system."

For years I have been critical of these three "epidemics" which I call "diagnosis du jour".

I recently proposed that children (of every age) use a Four Word Phrase when confronted with difficulties.  The phrase(s) indicate something about their attitudes, self concept, and how they perceive their environment.  I had suggested that children learn these phrases from The Child & Adolescent Guide for Manipulating Adults but really they learn them from us -- their parents and teachers.  Here are what some people submitted as "magic phrases" and my quick analysis of what it tells us about the child and his/her environment.

Dimensions shown by use of Four Word Phrases
Phrase(s)	Attitude	Self-concept	Perception of Environment
It won't happen again. I am so sorry.	assertive & taking personal responsibility	capable and positive	peaceful / reconciling
I am not sure. I didn't mean to.	passive	powerless actor	unclear
I forgot my meds. It wasn't my fault.	passive-aggressive	powerless victim	blaming
I have a gun.  Don't mess with me	aggressive	defeated	hostile

Now this is just a quick classification - I'd be open to hearing clarifications and improvements to the above.

Whether the above is accurate or not, the point I want to make is that the phrases people use "to get out of trouble" tell us something about them.  It also tells us something about ourselves  - because they learn them from us.

For example. how many times have you heard a student say "I forgot my meds"?  And how many times have you heard a teacher say under his/her breath or to a co-worker "He needs his meds"?  I bet there is a high correlation between the two.

We don't think we are teaching kids all the  time, but we teach as much by the content of our character as we do by the content of our curriculum.  We teach as much by our interactions WITH students as we do by our presentations TO them.

I'll discuss this more in the next article.

According to “The Child & Adolescent Guide for Manipulating Adults” it's supposed to be a free pass. The magic four words that get a student out of every difficulty.

 

Forgot your homework? Just mention this four word phrase and all is supposed to be forgiven. Disrupting the classroom or in trouble with your teacher? Yes, the magic phrase should work. At least it is worth a try.

 

In trouble on the playground? Give the phrase a try.

 

Mom or dad upset with you for disrespectful behavior? Right again. The phrase should get you out of most difficulties you encounter with adults.

 

Readers, what's your guess as to the magic phrase? And since there really is no published “Guide for Manipulating Adults” how do kids learn the phrase? And why does it work?

Why do we do the things we do?  The age-old question often brings up the age-old "nature-nurture" debate. Now the age-old debate has a new twist -- experience changes genes.

The essence of the nature-nurture debate has always been, how much of who we are is determined by nature (our genes) and how much by nurture (our experiences).  The argument can end up being an all-or-nothing, one-or-the-other debate.  Reasonable people usually will concede that the answer is probably "a little of each".  I often argue "It doesn't matter, we can't change our genes or our past experience. We can only move forward."

But it seems, I have been wrong.

In the past decade it has been found that experience can alter DNA (which affects our genes).  This effect is known as epogenetics. Because these changes affect genes, events early in life have the potential to make a lasting impact on behavior and health.

The September 29, 2010 issue of The Journal of Neuroscience published a study indicating that "early life stress, such as an extreme lack of parental affection, has lasting effects on a gene important to normal brain processes and also tied to mental disorders. See the Society for Neuroscience (SNF) article. Experience changes our genes

Sleep deprived kids have difficulty focusing.  And some sleep deprived kids get incorrectly diagnosed with ADHD (see Caution urged with medications). Since lack of sleep can be so detrimental to children's and adolescent's growth and development, a few people have asked me "What are the sleep needs for my child?"  Here is a chart I developed from information from the National Sleep Foundation in 2008.

Sleep Needs by Age and Associated Deprivation
Age	Need (hours / night)	Get (hours / night)	Deprivation (hours / night)
Under 1 year old	14 – 15 hours	12.7 hours	1.3 – 2.3 hours
1 – 3 year olds	12 – 14 hours	11.7 hours	0.3 – 2.3 hours
3 – 5 year olds	11 – 13 hours	10.4 hours	0.6 – 2.6 hours
5 – 12 year olds	10 – 11 hours	9.5 hours	0.5 – 1.5 hours
12 – 17 year olds	8.5 – 9.25 hours
Adult	7 – 9 hours	“better 6”	1 – 3 hours

When Sandy and I got married, we knew that we would have children someday.  Whether natural or adopted, we wanted to raise children and experience that aspect of life and giving.

We also knew that we wanted to share the experience of being stay-at-home parents.  We feel that it is important to spend time with your children and that the attachments formed in those first years are critical for relationships and development.

We knew other couples who thought the same as we did, but they eventually did not choose to stay at home and raise their children.  It seemed to us that their choices were made for financial reasons -- or should I say, lifestyle choices.  They had become accustomed to living on two incomes and didn't see how they could "cut back".  The mortgage was too big for one income and add to that the car payments and the added expense of children and it seemed to them undo-able.

Our solution: From day one of our married life and until the children were in school, we lived on one income.  During those first few years with dual incomes, we saved every penny of the second income for a down payment on our first house. We became accustomed to living within the means of one income and adding children to our family did not change our financial picture all that much. And the money saved for the bigger-than-average down payment on the house, kept the house payments lower too.